- What’s the summer assignment for [insert AP class here] again?
If you’re not asking this a few days before the first day of school, something’s definitely wrong with you. What are you trying to do—pretend like you got a grip on your life or something?
- It’s 4 a.m. again. When will I sleep?
Have you spent the whole day on your computer again, watching season after season of the next best TV show? Same. Talk about productivity!
- Friend 1: Hey I haven’t seen you in forever! We should meet up soon.
Friend 2: Yeah it’s been so long! I miss you…
Aw, how sweet. Planning to catch up with an old friend you haven’t seen in a while? Yeah, I’m sure that’ll happen. Didn’t you talk about “meeting up” for the past few summers? At least you can feel better about yourself by pretending to care.
- Oh my gosh, summer’s here! Time to get my summer body ready!
Uh, we know you ate a whole bag of chips at 1 a.m. after stuffing your face at a buffet. By the way, exercise doesn’t mean moving to the other side of your bed with your laptop. Only 1,000 more calories to burn before you exercise off just your midnight snack.
- What the heck. School starts in a few days?
Remember when you were exclaiming about how summer break was starting in just a few days? Well, say goodbye to sleeping in and say hello to waking up before the sun peeks out every day for the rest of the year! Oh, and you can’t forget the countless number of days you’ll pull an all-nighter. Coffee is your new best friend. Happy new school year!
Disclaimer: All comments are in good fun. Please don’t hate. Appreciate the humor.